It is all too easy to fall into the trap of replacing loose boundaries with ones that are overly rigid. We might feel like we are protecting ourselves by erecting a huge emotional wall around us, but in truth, we are simply insulating ourselves from positive experiences that are necessary to live a fulfilling life. As such, we must discover the mean that lies between these two types of boundaries. Those are the ones that we should aim to integrate into our daily lives. Boundaries that are too weak will inevitably be an emotional drain on our mental health. When we keep such boundaries, we implicitly allow others to trample over us. This leads to us feeling used, unappreciated, and taken for granted. On the other hand, rigid boundaries can make us feel extremely lonely. It is understandable to be defensive and overprotective if we have been betrayed or hurt by those closest to us, but keeping everyone at an arm’s length only leaves us feeling alone and uncared for.
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